Theoretically, what would happen in a Robredo presidency?

There may come a time when Digong will get so extremely fed up with all the destabilization plots against him…

that he’ll just pack his bags, along with his ever reliable kulambo…

and, head back to Davao. Back to his nocturnal taxi driver gig.

When that happens, it’s back to yet another female leader.

A dreaded moment for most. (And not because of gender issues.)


To show that she’s in control, Leni’s first decisive act would probably be to rename the international airports.

JRIA, for short. (In synch with the KatNiel name-coupling phenomenon.)

Not just one – but all three terminals.


Of equal importance is to appoint a go-to person… her special assistant… her very own Bong Go… but probably, more inches… taller… more macho… not as clean-shaven as Da Bong. My uzi friends are unanimous in their choice.


And because government cannot function without proper funding, Leni will be remiss in not appointing a Finance Secretary whose experience in juggling funds is unparalleled.


The critical Tourism portfolio rightfully belongs to one who has traveled extensively… and has seen the innate beauty of our country in islands like the Spratlys. A glib talker… an expert on hotels and the hospitality industry… a man who knows publicity is of utmost importance in any undertaking and can swing a TV interview on BBC or CNN effortlessly. There can only be one.


Intelligent Filipino kids are the caretakers of our future. Leni must certainly appoint an Education secretary whose intellect has been honed since childhood. Can you think of anyone else who was an expert on the intricacies of martial law while still at 6th grade?


To continue the big strides in Agriculture that DU30 nurtured, we need a DA Secretary to focus in a direction other than rice sufficiency which the country has already achieved.  This time it’s our lucrative banana export industry. One expert name rises above all.


Leni could use a battle-tested Press Secretary. One who has gone to war with just about each and every faux-journalist… or “blogger”, as she calls them.


The Presidential spokesperson should match the intellectual level of the President. Ladies and gentlemen, I propose the appointment of one who raised our consciousness on the quirky British royalty pecking pole… one who made us more knowledgeable of centuries-old titles like “Dutch” and “Duchess”.


With these essential people in place, the new President can proceed to more pressing important matters.

Like selecting historical landmarks and protecting these from damage and/or vandalism in the years to come. Offhand, I can pinpoint two.


OVP "Boracay Mansion" QC

The OVP “Boracay Mansion” QC

Bus stop on Magallanes/SLEX

I’ve gone quite a long way… but another theoretical question just came up.

What if the PET recount shows Bongbong really won the elections?

Esep esep.

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